When I was expecting my eleventh child I attended my consultant for a routine check up. After blood pressure was checked, temperature taken and weight checked he wanted to talk to me. He went on to tell me there was a risk my baby could be born with a disability because I was now forty years old. I refused to listen to him even though he was a respected consultant. Many women spent lots of money to go privately and get his help at the their births. I told him I believed in God and God would look after me and my baby. If I had shown any fear he would have offered me an abortion. I changed doctors. I found a Cathoilc lady doctor who didn’t judge me for having more children.
When I delivered my son Jacob another doctor suggested to me not to have any more children. He said, “Your body is like a car, it will break down.” I quickly responded, “No Doctor, God will renew my strength. I went on to have three more children. I was in my forties. I didn’t always listen to the doctor.
My husband said every time I went into labour it was like having a revival meeting. I would be calling on Jesus when I had a labour pain. Having my son Aaron was the most memorable time for Brendan. When I started in labour with Aaron we walked to the maternity home that was near where I lived. It was like a home from home. The midwives looked after the mothers. The GP doctor would be in attendance when the baby was due to be born. I was in labour all night. The night nurses stayed on in the morning to see my baby born. The night nurses and the new shift of nurses were all around my bed. The doctor was in the background waiting. The pains were getting intense. The nurse asked me to lift up my leg. I said “lift up The Lord “. Everyone was embarressed. Aaron was born to the sound of “Praise The Lord”. He was a bouncy baby boy weighing in at ten pounds ten ounces. Mother and baby were all well. Brendan went home to get a rest.
Two people who worked in the Maternity Home became pregnant after my visit there. One lady was a carer and another was a midwife. They were telling me when I returned to have my next child.
My consultant wasn’t the only one who wasn’t happy with me having many children. Another doctor said on his notes “This unfortunate woman is pregnant again”. That was when I was expecting Ruth, my seventh child! Friends and family were fearful for me. Thay thought something would happen to me if I continued having children. I became afraid of what others thought. I became pregnant with my eighth child. I was afraid to tell anyone I was pregnant again.
Well meaning friends invited me out for coffee or to the gym. They thought it would be good for me to get out for a time away from work at home with children. I attended exercise classes with a friend. I had never been to the gym before. I still didn’t tell anyone I was pregnant. At twelve weeks I had a miscarriage. I lost my baby. I could see the little human being of twelve weeks. Brendan and I were sad. Brendan took the small baby and put it in a box. He asked The Lord what to do. The Lord told him to buy a grave and bury our child and to give our baby a name.
For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be. (Psalm 139:13, 16 NIV)
Brendan bought a burial plot in the cemetery. He took all of us there to bury our child. All of our family gathered around as Brendan put the box in the soil. We prayed a prayer , cried a little and went back to the car. Brendan put the tape recorder on in the car. It played a song by a New Zealand couple with the words in it, “All the days ordained for me were written in your book.” We were all comforted by these words. Our baby lived twelve weeks but God knew every day ordained for her. My husband had a dream some time later. God showed him our baby was a little girl and he called her Deirdre. She was with The Lord in heaven. I hope this is a comfort to other mothers who have had a miscarriage or have had an abortion. God is taking care for the little ones. I will see my daughter in heaven. Like David when his son with Bathsheba died he said,
He answered, “While the child was still alive, I fasted and wept. I thought, ‘Who knows? The Lord may be gracious to me and let the child live.’ But now that he is dead, why should I go on fasting? Can I bring him back again? I will go to him, but he will not return to me.” (2 Samuel 12:22-23 NIV)
After loosing my baby I told God I was very sorry for being fearful of what others thought of me being pregnant. I told him I was sorry for going to the gym, which may have endangered my unborn baby. I realised that God is the author of life. It was not within my own power to save my baby. I had become blaze. I was always healthy and my babies were healthy. I determined never to be afraid of what others thought of me having children. I was delivered from the fear of man. Doctors, friends and family can give advice, but I want to obey God first. He is my creator and helper. I honor him.
David and Bathsheba had another son after their child died. I became pregnant again and had my son Patrick.